The Atlantic posted an article on a study of individuals living in poverty and so called, bad decision making. In a nutshell, circumstance cause individuals to be short sited in their goals and perpetuates the cycle of poverty.
The article entitled, Your Brain on Poverty: Why Poor People Seem to Make Bad Decisions ends with a quote from the author of the study.
As Eldar Shafir, the author of the Science study, told The Atlantic Cities' Emily Badger: “All the data shows it isn't about poor people, it’s about people who happen to be in poverty. All the data suggests it is not the person, it's the context they’re inhabiting.”
In a light switch “on” moment, I thought of the long-term financial effects of single parents. In the context of single parenthood, what monetary actions are we reinforcing? One of the participants of the study claims that everyday will be just like the last and enjoys small frequent pleasures to one or two big-ticket items.
This week my daughter and I were in Costco when she saw a bag of Doritos. In to the cart it went. Moments later she saw a bag of popcorn. I let her know it’s one or the other, but not both because it’s too much. She agreed. She chose her favorite snack, popcorn and promptly put the other bag back on the shelf.
With more frequency my daughter makes comments like, “we already have that at home”, “that’s too much, we don’t need it” and my favorite, “maaa! But I already have a dress! I don’t need another one.” These restrictions do not apply to shoes.
When it comes to parenting styles, I’m completely different than the one used to raise me. I explain the reason(s) behind my actions. Keep in mind these explanations are for a 3 year old. Not over the top, but in a manner that she can understand and we can move on.
My daughter hears me talk myself out of buying things on a regular basis because I have a 5 year renovation plan for my home that I’d like to fulfill (2.5yrs to go). Obviously, she’s not aware of the plans to upgrade the home, but she’s watching me show restraint and focus on the things that I truly love and/or want.
I can only hope this sticks with her and helps her out as an adult. It’s important for me to note that I’m not doing this for her per se, rather, I have a plan in mind that I’m trying to see through. In sticking to my plan she’s learning things along the way.
In the context of single parenthood and the multiple external and internal restrictions imposed on us what seems to have the strongest impact is one’s outlook on life in general. Immediate vs delayed gratification is one of many factors to navigate. Circumventing financial distress is necessary to avoid making brash decisions that negatively affect us in the long term.
Personally, there are some days where I’m tempted to simply say F it and do whatever. Being a parent is hard enough as it is. Whether it’s emotional or psychological, sometimes survival mode is key, however balance is necessary.
My question to you is, what are some things you’ve done that you see affecting how your child manages money in the future? Good, bad or ugly.
Comments