As children, we are brought up thinking that completing school and getting a degree is the answer. Cort is changing that mindset of his teenage daughters one life lesson at a time, “school is second and making the right choices is #1” is the mantra in his household.
There is a lesson to be learned everyday. As a single parent, finances are always on the agenda. This past summer his daughter received his prize money ($4k) from his bowling game to pay for her coding program at John Jay College, NYC. Cort said, “it’s important that she sees the sacrifices I’m making to invest in her. Money doesn’t grow on trees and she needs to see it.” His goal is to show his children a balance between getting fun big-ticket items and value.
For many of us, juggling bills has extra pressure. Cort’s experience after his break-up was an awakening. His ex had an MBA, a higher salary and more of the conventional know how to “do better”. At the time of their separation he was forced to go back home with a $40-50K salary, little to no credit, but fortunately no serious financial debt.
At the time, covering their medical insurance was a strain along with the new and “necessary” extracurricular activities newly in place post break-up. As a man, the social pressures of providing for your family is magnified when separated. The angst of, you’re the man and you’re supposed to take care of your children carries additional weight. Through extra work and honing in on his hobbies, such as bowling, he was able to meet those demands.
One of his biggest revelations was that looking good on paper doesn’t necessarily mean that you will do well in life.
When asked if there were signs he missed during their relationship on financial incompatibility, he reflected that he initially disregarded his ex never being forthcoming with her finances. After multiple conversations and attempts to understand her cash flow frustration set in and he gave up.
One of the perks of the separation was being more financially in control. That level of control (savings, established credit history, etc.), along with some family support paved the way to his new home. He notes that there is a “mental, physical and financial price to pay” when it comes to debt and financial stability.
The price of debt is clear. The price of financial stability is boundless. A year after separating he was able to purchase his first home.
Already his eldest has a checking account - which allows her to see first hand where her money goes. As a lesson, he opened an account for her, put some money in and nothing more. As she learns to check her account, see the money dwindling because she doesn’t have a job it, she now says, “there’s food in the fridge” when the youngest wants to go out to eat.
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